On Friday I read an article that has shaken me to the core (it can be found here in Afrikaans). It has had me thinking about it the whole weekend. The article was about a 12 year old girl that committed suicide because the “cool group” called her fat and ugly. Part of what has shaken me to the core is that this girl was in my community. She lived in my area, she went to one of the Afrikaans schools in my area, a school where I have friend’s kids going. She did karate at the Karate Academy in the area, the same Karate Academy that my “other child” goes to. This happened on my doorstep.
Last week Sharon at Blessed Baroness wrote about how kids were bullying two little girls at Tres Jolie. Bullying is happening and kids can be cruel, far worse than adults can be! I agree with what Sharon, “Parents, don’t raise your children to be assholes!” it is up to us to raise our kids right. It’s up to me to raise Ladybug right, to teach her to have respect for people no matter how they look, their background or even their race. It’s up to me to make sure that Ladybug doesn’t become the bully.
I can raise her to not become a bully, but what can I do to protect her? How do I protect her against the bullies of the world? I have seen it already. She is 3 and there are days she comes home very upset because her bestie didn’t want to play with her. She cries in the car because he said “No” when she wanted to play with him. Although this is not bullying, it shows me just how sensitive Ladybug is. Her love language is looking like Words of Affirmation, this means words mean so much more to her, both positive and negative. Words can do allot of damage in her little word, me moaning at her has more effect than a naughty corner or a hiding. This only means that bullying words are going to do allot of damage later on in life.
So how do I protect her from this? Do I go to the extreme of homeschooling her to protect her from the “Cool Group” and their comments? But what good would this do her in the long term? This little girl that took her own life was in Grade 6, she hadn’t even got to high school yet, she had barely experienced life.
My thoughts go out to the family, and my thoughts go out to my friend’s children who had crossed paths with and knew this little girl.