When is the right time to start disciplining your child? Now, next year or when they are a certain age and how do you discipline them? There are so many answers and so many theories, you could read up on them until your eyes pop out your head in a gooey mess or you could trust your instincts.
I have, in principal, chosen not to smack Madame – not that I see anything wrong or right with it, I was raised with a good AAK or 10 and I didn’t turn out THAT bad and I never lost respect for my Mom or Grandfather when I got a hiding, I was never given a hiding for just the sake of it, I had earned it (probably tenfold). I have chosen not to smack her because well, I just don’t want to and it won’t work for Madame.
Madame has a strong will and is as stubborn as me and her Granddad put together and multiplied by 5. We often have battles over the oddest of things, mostly putting clothes on or going to sleep when she’s dead tired. The other night we had a tantrum about going back to sleep, so I put her on the naughty stair for a time out and when I picked her up again it was all over. Now before anyone has a hissie fit at the fact that Im putting a 7 month old on a naughty stair hear me out first?
You can’t tell me she doesn’t understand, this one is clever and far too clever for her own good. She knows to stop doing things, like when she grabs my hair I ask her to let go and not pull Mommy’s hair and she does. She has touched a plug once and I have told her not to go there again, and she will push by going near it but won’t go to it exactly. I don’t find there is a need to smack her or yell at her. I simply talk to her, explain why and she gets it. I seldom use the word no, it’s rather don’t do this or that, or stop it. Sure I might be “negotiating” with her some might say, but I see it as explaining why I am doing it or saying it, giving her a reason.
Anyways back to the other night and the naughty stair, I put her on it in full tantrum swing, tears streaming down her face, screaming blue murder and being blood red. I sat her down on the stair told her to stop her tantrum and think about her being silly. I stepped out of direct sight, counted to 15 and went back to get her. Before I picked her up I went down to her level, asked if she had finished crying and she sniffed, took a deep breath and gave me a hug.
Now tell me that the naughty stair doesn’t work at this age?
Obviously everything in moderation, I won’t leave her there for long periods of time. I won’t be completely out of sight. I will never put her on it if there is no valid reason. I will always explain to her why she is being put there and I will always ask her if she is finished and follow it up with a big hug and lots of kisses. She needs to learn right from wrong and she needs to learn it from the beginning.
Yes, I might be a strict Mom, far stricter than my Mom was, but I’m a fair and loving Mom too, there is more love and giggles, smiles and laughs than there are tears and discipline.